"The body never lies." --Martha Grahm.
This blog is intended to be an exploration of what it is to have a body and navigate that relationship with said possession through mortality, society, and spirituality. It will include research, articles, pictures, quotes, personal stories, videos, insights, poems, monologues, letters, jokes, recipes, confessions, ETC. Hopefully in reading this you find connection, sincerity, and heart. Healing is possible. Living is the reward. Contribute!
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
why i no longer resolve to lose weight
Resolutions have always been a sore spot for me. It seems that every year
I would resolve to floss my teeth, and it never happened. I just got
tired of lying to myself, so I gave up.
memories of the approaching new year are littered with adult women eating
"one last slice" of pumpkin pie, or that "one last log" of
cookie dough with the knowledge that come January 1st they were hitting that
gym and banishing that sugar and renewing that Weight Watchers membership.
and advertisements flood December as I sing the words with my local
congregation "peace on earth good will to men."
Bally Total Fitness with our New Year Resolution discount and get the body
you've always wanted!" "Jenny Craig will help you meet this year's
goals and get the body you've always wanted!" "New Years
discount on the Bowflex--call for yours today, and get the body you've always
wanted!" "Why not spice up this year with something new?
Visit our website to check out great deals on cosmetic surgery and get
the body you've always wanted!"
I've always wanted. Always. Since the dawn of time. Before I
wanted survival, or milk, or warmth, or friends, I wanted to look smokin' hot.
You can see
her, can't you?
copy and paste her body parts onto mine. Her washboard abs over my strong
but soft stomach. Her clear skin sewn over my own, blemished. Her
large and perfect breasts. Her big doe eyes and full soft lips. Her
shiny, voluminous, tame hair. Her tight butt and tight face.
her and you envy her. There is, of course, no point in doing this because
she doesn't actually exist. But it doesn't matter. You will resent
and envy what you see of her in other women. So often we piece our ideal
selves together--at perfection we are not an entire, whole, complete woman, but
rather parts. I'll take her lips. And her shoulders. But she
can keep her thighs. Give me HER thighs instead. But not her waist.
I'll take HER waist. And her hair. But not her smile.
Savage's recent essay on this blog, "A Victorian lady couldn't show her
legs: a modern woman an only show legs that have been lasered to have all hair
and veins removed. Surrounded by silicon sacks, a carbon-based breast
isn't worth the adspace...Maybe the best way to finally outlaw real, human,
sexual bodies is to replace them with purified simulations. We've got our
own heavy paper to past over the indecent materiality of flesh: only ours are
printed with porn. Behind that heavy paper, the punishment and shaming of
women's body--of our breasts, our thighs, our asses--hasn't let up, in all
these centuries, for a second."
still want her breasts, her thighs, and her ass. And this is your year to
get them. 2013: Year Of The Rockin' Bod!
And if you
purchase OUR products and pills and programs and plans at these REASONABLE
prices, 2013 WILL be your year. You will arrive.
No one arrives. Ever. Look around. We've been had.
repeat that. No one arrives. The diet/fitness/makeup/fashion
industries make BILLIONS of dollars each year fueled by our resolutions get the
hell out of our own bodies. Our insecurities and self-loathing builds
those empires. Marketing is clever. So clever that most of us don't
even realize what has happened until we find ourselves at Weight Watchers in
Februrary having lost 20 pounds and wondering why we're still so, so unhappy.
We expected the sorrow of the world to recede as our bodies did.
see it? The world needs you. And the world needs you HERE.
All of you. Ready to fight the GOOD fights.
stopped. I'm stopping. I am no longer making promises to eat less
and exercise more. That is terrifying for some to hear. Lest you
imagine me with a bucket of KFC on the couch all of 2013 you need to understand
that I'm not giving up on my body. I'm giving love to my body. I'm
giving gratitude for my body. I love being healthy! I love being
able to hike mountains in beautiful places and run long races. I love
being able to buck hay bales and build fences. I love being able to hug
friends and talk late into the night. I went running this morning and
will most likely run tomorrow morning, but this is nothing new for 2013.
I've been living that way for years. I will eat a lot of fruits and
vegetables today and most likely chocolate. It has been that way for
years and will continue to be that way. I will continue to nourish and
learn how to nourish this beautiful made-in-the-image-of-Deity gift. In
2013 I will, in many ways, be the same woman I've always been. I will
find small changes daily to make in all aspects of my life and will strive for
sustainability. I will try to prioritize and remember that health
(physical, emotional, spiritual, mental) is more important than numbers, and
that forgiveness and empathy are more essential to exalting relationships than
my dress size.
Step off the
"capitalist treadmill," my sisters. Aren't you tired? Let's
waste and wear out our lives in a more noble cause. Don't give up. Give
in to something better in yourself. You're so good Happy 2013, everyone.
"I am stepping off the capitalist treadmill. I am going to
take a deep breath and find a way to survive not being flat or perfect. I am
inviting you to join me, to stop trying to be anything, anyone other than who
you are. I was moved by women in Africa who lived close to the earth and didn’t
understand what it meant to not love their body. I was lifted by older women in
India who celebrated their roundness. I was inspired by Marion Woodman, a great
Jungian analyst, who gave me confidence to trust what I know. She has said that
'instead of transcending ourselves, we must move into ourselves.' Tell the
image makers and magazine sellers and the plastic surgeons that you are not
afraid. That what you fear the most is the death of imagination and originality
and metaphor and passion. Then be bold and LOVE YOUR BODY. STOP FIXING IT. It
was never broken."