Sunday, August 19, 2012

P.S.--Postpartum Stories

Having never given birth, know that I claim no authority or expertise on the subject.  What I'm hoping for is to get a surplus of stories by women who ARE experts on the matter.  What makes an expert?  As far as this blog is concerned, if you have been pregnant/given birth/lived to tell, you are an expert.

Most of us haven't been in a delivery room, or at the side of a home birth.  Every story is unique and different, and yet there is much that is transferable, woman-to-woman.  Mother-to-mother.

Where do the majority of us (even those who have had personal experience) receive our narrative on birth?  Where we receive most narratives (though I think blogs are helping in someway to offer diversity in perspective).  Thanks, Hollywood.

There's the scene with the screaming woman in a hospital gown, being rushed in a wheelchair by her group of girlfriendsies...there may or may not be a dad in the picture, and if he's there, he's most likely being yelled at, blamed for the immediate excruciating pain the woman is in.  There are varieties on this scene, but it often ends with the dust settling, the smoke clearing, the happy mother holding her new little joy.  Her angel fresh from Heaven.  And that's all well and good, but then the scene ends, and all-too-often, the movie ends.

We don't hear about her postpartum depression, the changes in her body, her relationship with her husband, the scars birth leaves, the monotony, responsibility, and sleepless nights being a mom of an infant brings.  I guess these topics don't make for a solid blockbuster screenplay?

So, veterans, war-heroes, experts, mothers...tell me.  Tell us.  What does hollywood leave out?  What would you like a woman pre-her first pregnancy to know?  What would you like your fellow mothers to know?  What would you tell soon-to-be fathers?  What would you share with women who will never be mothers?  What is wonderful and what is wrenching?  Give us the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but.  Give us YOUR truth.

7 comments:

  1. You know I love this topic. I'm glad you thought to call for stories!

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  2. I am glad I knew absolutely nothing about birth before I had my first child. I was adopted an my mother was never able to carry or give birth, so I had no idea what to expect. I thought experiencing pregnancy was amazing. I felt so much like a co creator with god. To know I was growing a human body that would hold a spirit of god is a wonderful feeling. Birth was scary, every time. Having children is something that never gets less scary. But I will say that I am a total wimp but when you give birth there is a calm inner power that comes over you. And you know that you have to do this. Its powerful and wonderful. I'll write more later if you would like me too. I have a lot of experience with postpartum body and feelings. Let me know!!

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    1. Audra, YES. Write, write, write. And then send it to dana.rose.fleming@gmail.com

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  3. A few things people rarely mention about post birthing...hemorroids, cramping, BLEEDING, crazy emotions, hair falling out in clumps, just to name a few. It's a tough road for the first few months, but having been through it twice now I am able to know and understand that I will pull through it. But I know my first go around I was really scared that things weren't going to get better, but they do, and hormones balance themselves out again. Whenever I see a first time pregnant mom to be I cringe at what I know they will go through, but it's all part of the plan....somehow.

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    1. lady--you need to write your story and email it to me.

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  4. Heh. Do you take submissions from people who've written in before?

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