"The body never lies." --Martha Grahm.
This blog is intended to be an exploration of what it is to have a body and navigate that relationship with said possession through mortality, society, and spirituality. It will include research, articles, pictures, quotes, personal stories, videos, insights, poems, monologues, letters, jokes, recipes, confessions, ETC. Hopefully in reading this you find connection, sincerity, and heart. Healing is possible. Living is the reward. Contribute!
Friday, May 18, 2012
the skinny on skinny, or MOASB #8--by Camille
if you're just tuning in, head here for an explanation
I’m a full 6 feet tall. I have the longest torso. When I sit on an airplane, I my head is entirely above the top of the seat back. When I sit down next to my friend who is 6 foot 10 inches, I’m “taller” than him. I also have long legs. Until I got pregnant I was a 34A.
Growing up, I had a bunch of reasons (see above) to maybe feel insecure – but I just didn’t. In my family, being tall is “beautiful” and at family reunions this feature is celebrated as a thing of pride.
My mom always told me I was “perfect/wonderful/just right/ just the way I was” and my dad treated me very kindly as well. My siblings and I just didn’t comment on each other’s appearance and I’m pretty sure we only had 2 mirrors in our whole small house.
My mom and dad are really amazing people. They are kind and smart and humble. The house we grew up in was pretty humble as well. It was not fancy in the slightest. Although my dad had what I now know is a pretty good job, it seemed that growing up we were kind of poor- at least relation to other around us. My dad drove a car to work where you could literally see the road from the front passenger seat floor and my mom never bought any boxed or processed foods. We ate vegetables and beans and rice and some fruit. Although we kind of lived like a poor family I didn’t really feel poor because I was happy.
This happiness really continued for me as I went to college and a mission for the LDS church and as I came back to college after that. That’s when I met my husband. My husband is amazing. He treats me like his father treats his mother. He makes me feel nearly like a goddness by the way he talks to me, talks about me, looks at me and the way that he lives his life. I know that this is now the number 1 reason I feel great with my body. When we first got married, I just just gotten back from a 3 week trip to South East Asia where I had walked literally hundreds of miles and I weighed a mere 135 lbs. When I gave birth to our darling baby girl just over a year later I was over 200 lbs – which if you talk to nearly any doctor – they will not recommend gaining that much weight… Throughout that whole time and until now, Scotty has made me feel beautiful through everything.
We do other things in our family now to help us stay healthy. Scotty makes a kale, oj, blueberry, flaxseed smoothie for me almost every night and we try to eat a bit more in line with Dr. Joel Fuhrman’s “Eat to Live” and “Super Immunity” recommendations as opposed to the standard American diet.
There were plenty of times I was asked/accused of being anorexic or told I was too skinny (especially when I was in middle school) but the main point here is that these were not people who were close to me. Their comments slid right off me and I didn't really mind. Oddly, even though I was skinny, I ate and still do eat A LOT of food. There have even been times someone has said "Stop eating!" "Why are you eating so much?!" I don't really know how to explain why someone would say something like that to anyone- but there it is. I think the most offense and the most damage can be done by those who are closest to us and so I think that's why these random comments were no biggie. They were from some one at some point in high school or middle school that I was not close with. And the people I am closest to, my husband and family, are nice- regardless of my size.